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SubjectRe: ** Fork 1, Draft Final-2 **
> > Linux kernel version 2.2.0 released
>
> The ".0" is not good. It is like "Windows NT 4.0, service pack 0".

The problem is that 2.2 isn't being released. 2.2.0 is. 2.2 will last two
years, probably.

Besides, at least Linux users don't have to wait months for a service pack, and
don't have to reinstall it after every application. =)

> With "released" in the past tense, this press release is lifeless.
> I suggest present tense for the whole thing.

Well, it has been released. You can't put everything in the present tense, or it
sounds awkward. "Releasing Linux kernel version 2.2.0"? What do you suggest?

The reason the tenses are the way they are is that

(1) events, e.g., "Linux kernel released," are in the past tense because they did
happen. They are not happening as we speak; they already happened.

(2) features, e.g., "Linux 2.2 supports...," are in the present tense because no
matter when you read this, Linux 2.2 supports it. 2.3 or 2.4 or 3.0 might
support other things, but 2.2 always supports what you read here.

> I had to word wrap the above, because the lines got too long.
> It would be better to stick to 72 characters.

72 isn't long enough for some of the URLs. I've changed it to 75.

> I like "WAN (wide area network)" better than "wide area network (WAN)".

> Think about "wide support for a wide". "256-bit" is better than "(256-bit)".

Traditionally, the acronym goes in the parenthesis. Either way, both are there,
which is the important part. The 256-bit encryption, though, is a good idea.
Done.

> Feature check:
>
> - priority traffic <-- important new QoS queueing stuff

I'm not familiar with this. Please suggest a fix.

> X usage limits
> - firewalls <-- much more flexible now

Gotcha.

> : * Strong 256-bit encryption, available as an add-on component
> : uncompromised by US export restrictions. Linux protects both
> : network infrastructure and hard disk storage, including swap space.
>
> If you want that second one as a complete sentence:
> "Linux provides strong [...]"

I have a better idea. Check my latest draft. (Website:
http://bigred.lcs.mit.edu/~krose/linux2.2.0pr-f1.html)

> > * Owing to its tradition of open and international development, Linux
> > is positioned as an operating system ready for the new millennium.
> > Linux 2.2 is Y2K ready and continues to build on previous versions'
> > internationalization.
>
> This fits better in the BACKGROUND section.

No. People want to see this as a feature. I don't know quite why, but I've
gotten some pretty strong opinions about it.

> > * The network file system support is enterprise-grade, with data
> > replication for performance, mobility, and reliability.
>
> Hmmm. Try this:
>
> : * Linux has enterprise-level network filesystem support, with data
> : replication for performance, mobility, and extreme reliability.
> : File server destruction need not and should not stop business.
>
> I still think "complete with" is appropriate.

Again, check the latest draft and tell me what you think.

> > * New multimedia capabilities include video capture support, TV tuner
> > support, and enhanced audio support.
>
> Except for audio, Linux had no multimedia capabilities before?
> I suppose it is mostly true, but we shouldn't imply that it is.
> This seems nice:

>
> : * Video conferencing and recording support, TV tuner support,
> : enhanced audio support, and other exciting multimedia enhancements.
>
> Again, if you prefer whole sentences: "Linux 2.2 provides [...]"

I like this the way it is. I have also avoided having a string of "Linux 2.2
provides" or "Linux 2.2 offers" prefixes.

> > * Linux's already legendary performance is significantly enhanced. High end
> > symmetric multiprocessing (SMP) support scales well, supporting systems
> > with up to 64 processors.
>
> Use "High-end", not "High end", but only if you insist.
>
> Try simple terms like "computers with multiple processors" instead of
> complicated terms like "symmetric multiprocessing (SMP)".

Business users like buzzwords. Computer with multiple processors can imply
message passing networks, which is significantly more trivial than SMP support.

> I hate "performance is significantly enhanced" for some reason.
> It is passive voice and seems to parody the typical press release.

I still like this. Passive voice is not bad for a press release. It adds a
detachment that makes it sound less biased.

> Don't ever write "Linux's". Besides violating Linus's trademark rights,
> it just doesn't look that good.

Took out "Linux's." Now, it's "Already legendary performance..."

> > * Compatibility with Windows NT and Unix filesystems enables Linux 2.2 to
> > seamlessly handle data from legacy systems. SAMBA (http://www.samba.org/)
> > gives a Linux system the ability to provide a complete replacement for NT
> > Server services, including file and print sharing and domain
> > authentication.
>
> Ah, but no NTFS support? Not only that, but Samba is old news.
> Samba isn't even part of the kernel. Linux supports some BSD
> filesystems, but not many Unix filesystems. (only the old "sysv")

We can't list everything in full detail. That's where the millenium penguin
document comes in. Holy Library, Batman! I'm a press release, not an
encyclopedia!

> If you use the "Windows", you need to credit Microsoft. If you stick to
> plain "NT", you can credit Northern Telecom Limited instead.

I don't care if we credit Microsoft. We already mention the name "Microsoft" in
the Vinod quote. I'm content with the "Microsoft is a registered trademark...."
line.

> Don't ever use "modify". Why would anybody want to do that?

I like "modify," because it both "customize" and "fix" imply it. One of the most
important features of Linux is the ability to fix it if there's a problem. I
don't think we should be claiming that Linux is perfect, because it is not. The
advantage to being Free Software, however, is that they have the source and can
fix it themselves if no one else does.

> Use "every user" rather than "any user".

Done.

> > distributed as Free Software under the terms of the GNU General Public
> > License (http://www.fsf.org/copyleft/gpl.html).
>
> This is getting _way_ too detailed.

It's important. I (and many others) feel very strongly about the information
contained in this paragraph. It's (IMO) the most important feature of Linux.

> OK, as long as we can really expect that.

SuSE.

> > "Linux" is the common name for a class of secure network operating system
> > distributions based on the Linux kernel and software from the Free Software
> > Foundation's GNU Project. Linux takes full advantage of modern, high-end
> > PC, Power Mac, Alpha, and UltraSPARC hardware. It can also breathe life
> > into older machines -- even 386- and 486-based computers. Networks of Linux
> > computers can provide supercomputer-like performance for some applications;
> > one widely-known example is the dramatic 3-D scenes in the blockbuster
> > movie "Titanic", which were rendered on Alpha-powered Linux systems.
>
> Simplify! Kill "distributions" (what are they?),

We don't necessarily want to imply that SuSE is a different operating system than
RedHat, so I don't want to say "operating systems" without distribution.

> GNU (not fair),

Of course it is fair. This paragraph is meant to clarify one of the biggest
misconceptions about Linux.

> the Alpha and UltraSPARC (huh?),

Why should I kill this? It's important that users know that they can run it on
their hardware.

> the 386 (long gone),

Not where I worked...

> and "Titanic" (getting old).

Not everyone knows this, and so many people saw and loved the movie that they
will find it interesting that Linux helped in making it. I didn't like Titanic,
but I appreciate the technology.

> Stick to the goal. This document has "designed by committee" all over it.
> Oh, so it was designed by committee... Try to hide that!

Who cares who designed it? We are trying to satisfy a lot of people with this
very small document, so it makes sense that we can't please everyone.
Eventually, we're just going to have to go with something, but we can keep making
it better until then.

> You forgot IRC,

Yeah, where the hAx0rZ hang. I know EFNET has a lot of good support groups, but
IRC has such a bad rep that we don't want to bother.

> "Ask Slashdot",

I love Slashdot, but the best way to put a prospective Linux newbie off is for
them to visit that site. There are so many complete and utter trolls there that
90% of the posts are useless. I'd rather they visit these sites on their own, so
we aren't implying that this is the best support available.

Mailing lists and USENET are still the best resources for Linux help, IMO.

> The term "Usenet" is kind of dead. Many people know mailing lists as
> "email groups". It is better to be vague: "cost-effective Internet groups".

"Cost-effective"? ugh... no thanks. I took that out for a reason. I think most
people know what a mailing list is, and virtually everyone has interacted with
usenet at one point or another. What is an "Internet group"? I can't in good
faith put that in there, because if I saw it, it would confuse me.

> > due to its open source code - has a long term credibility which exceeds
> > many other competitive operating systems."
>
> We can't use "UNIX" here. We can't use it anywhere at all.
> Only reporters may use the term without prior authorization,
> and they still have to be careful about proper use.

We can't even if we list the trademark? Doesn't this come under fair use?

> > Linux is a trademark of Linus Torvalds.
>
> registered trademark

Done.

> That list has got to go. It is growing without bounds. It is full of
> sites that aren't really suitable. The list will never be fair.
> It looks totally "designed by committee". It must die, die, die!!!

People can look at the "General" sites if they want, but more specific
information is available if they need it. News people will just tear this apart,
anyway.

> If you have translators, please encourage them to make an approximate
> translation that fits their culture. Exactness is of little use.
> They should also change the URLs to native-language web sites.

Yes.

**** FYI: final-3 is available at

http://bigred.lcs.mit.edu/~krose/22release-f1-final-3.txt

Kyle


--
Kyle R. Rose "They can try to bind our arms,
Laboratory for Computer Science but they cannot chain our
MIT NE43-309, 617-253-5883 minds or hearts..."
http://web.mit.edu/krr/www/ Stratovarius
krose@theory.lcs.mit.edu Forever Free




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